If you've made it to this website, then it's a fair assumption that you also have the intense misfortune to have been cursed with the cruellest and most unholy affliction ever to befall humanity... that's right, the waking nightmare of Pruritus Ani.
You'll know all too well the abject misery that it brings... The pain! The tears! The cold sweats! The blood! The horror! The wailing and gnashing of teeth! The desperate prayers to a thousand gods that you don't believe in, begging for one of them to deliver you from this evil...
Every single night it comes like a demented incubus, that horridly familiar tickle that grows and grows into that painful itch... ending up with that unbearable sensation like you're being attacked by millions of furious fire ants that gain their sustenance from your screams of anguish and torment.
You know you shouldn't scratch... but after a heroic amount of almost-coping with rolling around and biting and clawing at the pillows, it always ends up in heartbreaking defeat as you reach down and scratch, giving you very temporary and guilty relief and simultaneously causing your leg to kick out like it's possessed and your mouth to emit a noise that sounds like a wounded gazelle giving birth to an ancient Babylonian demon...
You've tried many lotions and potions, and nothing has had even the mildest effect... And so this is to be our fate.
But wait! It turns out that there is an alternative ending to this tale of woe. Do not let yourself fall into despair - lift your head and allow hope and optimism to once again flood through your soul. For there is a cure. It is a cure that *actually works*. And its name is Pranicura.
So here is my slightly more serious aside - I've had this horrible condition for probably about 3 years, it started quite subtle and then got worse and more frequent culminating in being quite unbearable over the last 12 months. I tried another couple of creams and wipes which had good reviews, but they didn't do a thing. This stuff genuinely works - it basically seems to replace that intense itching with a curious (and not exactly unpleasant) sensation that's kind of halfway between heat and numbness! Initially it seemed to work for a few hours and then the itch would come back, but you could kill it again by cleaning off with wet wipes and re-applying (as they instruct you to)… what this process does is allow you to stop scratching the area and lets everything heal itself! After doing this for about a week the itches just stopped coming back... and they've been gone now for about 2 months (except for very occasional and mild ones that can be immediately neutralised with a small application).
So yes, all these other reviews are absolutely true - Pranicura's one of the best things I've ever spent money on, and well worth getting shipped over from the USA - I genuinely feel like I've got my nights back again and have started to remember what a good night's sleep feels like.
So do it! Join us in this wonderous promised land, where the sun shines slightly brighter, the landscape is awash with colour, and the air carries the sounds of joyous songs sung in major keys! You'll never look back :)
